I had a colonoscopy today.
For those of you lucky enough not to know, in order to do a colonoscopy the doctors need a clear, clean colon. And there’s only one way to do that.
In my case that meant 4 Dulcolax and a 238ml bottle of Miralax poured into some Crystal Light iced tea. This after eating nothing but a lemon italian ice and 1 bottle of Ensure for the 21 hours prior.
After awhile the stuff started working, but then the same thing happened this time that happened last time I went through this: I started getting nauseous. Very nauseous. Despite drinking a ton of water I started vomiting. I’m not sure if my system didn’t like the Mirolax, or if it didn’t like it combined with Crystal Light iced tea, or if I was just getting dehydrated.
So, suffice to say I did not feel well.
It was a rough night, but Husband was kind enough to finish giving Son the pizza I microwaved for him, and to make supper for himself. He was also nice enough to leave me the dishes and the job of making Son’s lunch for school the next day. He did agree to drop Son off at school the next morning – only the second time ever (the first was last year’s Colonoscopy). I’m not complaining – that’s what I do while he’s at work.
But why is it that some men need explicit instructions on how to do simple daily tasks? Why does a man with a four year old have to be told night after night where the pajamas are kept (okay, he stopped asking awhile ago, but he asked for waaaaay too long!)? And why does the observation that Son needs a bath have to predicate a hissy fit of epic proportions about being late for work instead of a simple question of whether it needed to be done before school or if it could wait until after? And why would he not know that his sick wife would appreciate help getting Son ready for school, that “getting ready for school” means getting him dressed and fed, and to do that himself?
So I, still issuing orders from both ends, made Son breakfast and got him dressed. Husband did put on his socks and shoes and put the lunch I’d made the night before into his lunchbox with the cold pack, so there’s that.
And I think he wished me good luck as he left with Son, but I wouldn’t know.
I was still issuing orders.